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My Blog is about many things, adult adoptee, autism, family, laughter, and love, feel free to follow me on my journey, and look through my archives. It takes more than one subject to define me or my family. We are a mixture of a bit of everything!

Monday, June 21, 2010

SPD, Meltdowns, and Toddler Stage?!!!



I am having some problems lately trying to figure out if it's SPD (Sensory Processing Disorder) or my Toddler's age. He definitely has SPD. That's not in question. My concerns are trying to separate when he is having Sensory issues or just being a Toddler. Three and a half years old is a very trying time for any mother. Now add to that your child being Non-Verbal. It's very frustrating at times. Today was one of those days for me. It is his first full day out of school. I am very bruised and battered from his nightly Meltdowns. Some nights I wake up to a punch in the face or a kick in the ribs. I am afraid to let him sleep alone. I am afraid he will injure himself. 

Today I wanted to stay home.The sun is out, it's bright and pretty, but I'm exhausted! So I planned to just hang with Tafari. I woke up to being bit on the thigh. While I was nursing my thigh he kicked me in my back. I had a couple of kids t.v. shows lined up for him to watch and he did good for a minute. Until he bit my DVR. I had to hold him down for ten minutes to calm him down. The whole time he tried to scratch my eyes out. He cried I cried. He threw my phone at me. So like a true blogger I took pics.

Tearful Battered Mom... 
he ripped three dreadlocks out of my head.

Mid-Meltdown, 
tearing up and attempting to destroy
dining room.

 He hasn't had a daytime meltdown like this in months. All my skills went out the window today. I think he had a Meltdown because of the School Summer schedule. Thank goodness Summer School starts Monday. All our therapists are off this week too. Lisa, my angel, my in-home therapist is off until Monday too! I didn't realize how much Tafari and I rely on our routine. I finally got him to watch some Hip Hop Harry. Today was not a Spongebob day. It upset him even more. He flipped out on Spongebob. I wish that sponge could've took some of his punches! SPD, Meltdowns, and Toddler stages. It's hard to tell the difference at times.

In between all of this I am getting calls trying to be lured into adult drama.... you've got to be kidding me!!! Like I have the time to care!!

Well now he's napping and I feel better. 

Blogging is truly Therapeutic!


23 comments:

Jenn @ South of Sheridan said...

Wow, I can't even imagine how rough today must have been for you. Here's hoping things calm down and the return of your regular schedule helps Tafari from more meltdowns.

Brittany Ciara said...

Oh Jane. I can only imagine how you feel. I remember when my cousin was younger and acted out. Sending prayers your way for a better tomorrow.

Cheeseboy said...

Wow, you are a dedicated blogger to take a picture of yourself in such a state. Here's hope for calmer days ahead.

Shell said...

What a day! Hope things get better once you get back into your routine!

Meeko Fabulous said...

Awwww! Sending you a big hug and kiss. I'm sure not being on routine is totally throwing Tafari off.

Oka said...

Prayers for your sanity and health and for you both to figure it out. I can't imagine what you going through. I have a hard enough time dealing with my current toddler(who is 1000x worse than any of my others at this stage). I cry often from dealing with him.


((((JANE))))

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

I'm sorry, that is just sucky. The perseverance will be your blessing in the end and your child will be better for it! You are awesome Jane.

That picture about broke my heart thought, I must admit!

Adoption of Jane said...

Awww y'all are the best. I am feeling a little better now. He just woke up from his nap and is dancing and laughing. Go figure, lol! It's just one of those days. My intention on my blog is to be open and honest so I really felt the need to post this for other mothers going through the same issues as well. It's so funny i just read an old comment I wrote on another blog: the only “disability” disrupting my home is an atypical tween. HAHAHA insert foot in mouth... oh yeah my kid did it for me!

Kmama said...

I am so sorry Jane. I don't know how you do it. ((HUGS))

My kids are basketcases when their routines get messed up, so I can't even imagine in a child with special needs.

Logical Libby said...

Your poor head, and I don't just mean because of the hair pulling! You deserve a massage and a drink.

Traci said...

Oh, sweetie! I have a three and a half year old and she can be trying. But I know that you have other burdens that I do not carry. I can only say that I send you support and care and prayers. Please know that you are not alone even in your darkest moments.

Evonne said...

My son, almost 5, has been absolutely ridiculous since his sister got out of school. I don't have the same things too deal with as you do, but little boys can be hard to deal with sometimes.

Hugs!!

Ms. Understood said...

Wow. What a tough day. I can't imagine how tough that was. That picture is the truth. I'm sorry that it's so tough, but you are doing you best, so you can't beat yourself up about it.

Dawn said...

I'm sorry ~ I've been there, still am...it does get better though

ClosedOnSunday said...

I know I'm late to the game, but I'm really sorry to hear that you had such a trying day. You're right, being suddenly without a schedule is probably a huge adjustment for him. The fact that he's 3, coupled with the special needs, just made it so much worse. You are one tough cookie, lady! And I can tell just from blogging that you're a great mamma, too.

faerwillow said...

~oh jane...big hugs for you and tafari...your job, your position, your motherhood and friendship with your son brings forth surprises and battles many have never seen or experienced...your tears are real...and felt.

you walk a road that is full of l♥ve and compassion...remember that especially on the not so easy days...you are his strength and sometimes that is hard to remain steady when all is faultering.

my oldest has sensory processing disorder, years have passed and i can say...life has gotten much easier. i think you are dealing with all that you stated. the combo of a toddler struggling to express himself and his body having a hard to adjusting to situations...when thrown of kilter it backfires...i do not know if it is possible in your home space wise, but we have a swing from ikea that hangs from the ceiling and it has been very theraputic for both my oldest and youngest. they say swinging stays in their system for up to 7 days after giving calming affects...my oldest used to swing in it all the time...self healing i think for him...or maybe trying bubbles or a bath to detour...all just suggestions and i do know in their fiery it can be hard to get them to settle enough to try and rationalize and sooth them...jane my heart is with you always and may calmness sweep over your home and the both of you...much l♥ve and light upon you and yours always and brightest blessing shining down~

pr0udmom0f3 said...

It's very likely a mixture of both the SPD and his being a toddler. And at times, it really IS hard to discern what the main cause is.

In time, you will be able to figure out when what is happening...and why.

Just watch closely and monitor (as well as write down) when things happen, what the possible trigger is and create a pattern. By that, you should know which is at play when he melts like that.

*LLUVIA* said...

aawwww....!! It broke my heart to look at your tearful face!! :(


I can only imagine what it was like for you.

I hope today is better.

Joyful said...

Big hugs. I can't imagine having to deal with such outbursts at such a young age. My niece also lashs out but she has no strength to really hurt anyone.

I did learn through my niece that schedule changes are hard on her but over the years she has grown to accept them better as long as we can let her know in advance.

She didn't learn to talk until age 8 or 9 and now she talks quite well though schools did try to channel her into sign language only. Her mom was persistent and I'm glad about that because she has better communication with a range of people most of whom don't sign. I hope after Monday your little one can get back to feeling secure and you can have more peace.

Glamazon said...

Oh my gosh, that is awful! I am so so sorry. I don't even know how you would deal with that...you are amazing. Hope things get better!

Mel Fraase said...

I'm so sorry you are dealing with so much! You are one strong mama and your love is stronger than a three-you-old meltdown, even when it takes everything out of you. I sincerely hope it gets better, and soon!

Erin said...

Ugh! That's just rotten I wish I could give you a hug. I've been out of commission dealing with Colby's pneumonia and I think I'd take breathing problems over SPD any day of the week. I hope that getting his schedule back helps and that you can hang in there

Stacie said...

Oh how I know the frustrated feelings. Only I dealt with the physical stuff when it was time to go to school. Not because our routine was out of schedule. Those kinda meltdowns just break your heart as it's hard to see them go through something like that and you feel helpless because you just don't know what to do. I hope today is better :) One day at a time.

 

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