5 Tips for raising a Child of Another Race

Well I love the Idea of Wordful Wednesdays… all them pics with so much to say suits me just fine!

(my orphanage in Hoima, UG)

5 Tips for raising a Child of Another Race

(mum, dad, & me)

My parents were in the Peace Corps in Uganda during the late 60’s to early 70’s. They worked at an orphanage where my mummy, Darlia placed me.
They brought me back to the U.S.
and started the adoption process for me at age four or five.
Well since I am a pro and all I decided to give a few tips.

(me and dad)

My tips will probably be all over place… seeing that I’m in my early 40’s now. But feel free to email me any further questions you have. AutisminLongBeach@yahoo.com. Subj: Multi-Racial Adoptions.

(me and great-grandma Peterson)

Starting off life being given away is a rough start for a kid.
You can’t sugar coat it, it’s a fact.

However, if you can pump your child full of knowledge, self-esteem, and self worth they will blossom and your bond with them will as well!

(my cousin Erica & I first day meeting)

Tip 1. DO take your child to their birthplace during their childhood. It can be quite costly so pick a parent and take turns if your family is bigger than your wallet. Obviously it can’t be an Annual thing, but stage it during appropriate times in their growth. Don’t waste money on taking them under the age of five, it won’t be very memorable. Take them during big life events, such as graduations (leaving Elementary, leaving Jr. High, Graduating from High School).

(me at orphanage)

Tip 2. DON'T scream at them in Public. My mum is Notorious for this one! I know you may be thinking I want them to know they are the same as my other kids, no special treatment! That’s a load of Bull! We are different and there are times when it needs to be respected. My mum, who was a Peace Corps, Flower wearing, We are The World Lady (which I love by the way), was totally oblivious to our surroundings and the stares. She spent so many years in Uganda being the Minority she was unaffected by people staring and whispering. Now for me on the other hand, it was the total opposite! And my mum (bless her heart) talks very loud when she’s trying to make her point! 

I’d be wandering off in the Grocery Store and she’d scream “BETTY (my nickname when I was young, my middle names Elizabeth) WHERE DO YOU THINK YOUR GOING???!!! GET YOUR BUTT BACK HERE!!!” Of course, the whole store would turn and I’d cringe like a Runaway Slave! They had no idea she was my mum! We both look back at those things now and laugh! But at the time the humiliation was excruciating.

(mum & me)

Tip 3. DO involve your child in an activity with just their Race. Nothing is worse than feeling like an outsider with your “own people”. Find your nearest Cultural Center and find out what kids activities they have, even if you have to drive far once a week or month to the nearest City. Most adopted children (out of race or not) have an incomplete part of them and with Children of Multi-Racial adoption, just knowing who you are really builds your self-esteem. Most important, let it be their activity! Wait in the car or go get a cup of Joe. This is about them, not you.

(me and neighborhood kids, Compton, CA 70's
yeah i am the sexy bitch picking her teeth
with her tshirt knotted as a tube top, don't hate)

Tip 4. DON'T have a toy box full of white items for a non-white child. This is 2010! There are dolls and action figures of every race. Go online if you have too but make sure their Toy Box includes a variety of items that Represent all Races.

(me at grandma's house)

Tip 5. DO teach your child their original language. If you don’t know it… Learn it! Go online, Google Rosetta Stone… or whatever program you choose to use. Also consider where they are from and what language is truly spoken. For example, where I am from there is Luganda, Chiga, and Swahili… as an adult I am still having difficulties figuring out the difference. Chiga has been easiest for me to pronounce and understand so thanks to my brother-in-law, Ken, I am studying it now. It would have been much easier as a child to learn this! I am sure I will still be corrected by my fellow Ugandans on what I just posted, LOL!

(Uganda Flag)

*BONUS TIP: If you decide after adopting one child to adopt another child, remember, you are not the United Nations, or Brangelina, and we are not accessories that come in different colors and sizes.
Adopt a Child of the same background so your Adopted kid will have someone to relate to. What better gift then to have someone that is going through the same things, someone whom can travel home with them one day, someone they can relate to. Then if you want to adopt more kids explore other options… If you want to keep adopting be like Noah, make sure they are in pairs before they board your Ark.

(me and cousins Gabe, Erica, Me, and Dez)

Thanks Seven Clown for Wordful Wednesdays!