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My Blog is about many things, adult adoptee, autism, family, laughter, and love, feel free to follow me on my journey, and look through my archives. It takes more than one subject to define me or my family. We are a mixture of a bit of everything!

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

My Funny Valentine....


It just hit me... I think this is the first Valentines Day I wasn't bitter. I wasn't thinking about the Man next to me who wasn't treating me right that day. I wasn't thinking about how I "wish I were in a relationship". I wasn't thinking about any of that. The thought of a Man didn't cross my mind until this morning when I saw my Facebook News Feed of all the gifts gals got. Then, when I saw them all I thought was "thats nice". And kept it pushing. I was also thinking about how I feel I don't really have anything to blog about. I saw the "I heart faces" red theme but... I still kept it pushing. Why am I going to join a photo contest that only selects winners that have professional looking photos. I don't mean that in a mean way. I really like the group and the photo's are beautiful. If you are a professional photographer, or take professional like pics.. I suggest that challenge. I am merely stating a fact. So I kept it pushing. 

What I mean by keeping it pushing is I keep moving forward. I no longer interact with people and things that I have nothing in common with. More importantly I am not bitter. I am so excited to realize this morning that I am achieving that Self-Content, Self-Confident goal. The goal where I acknowledge my own worth. I went through some bad relationships and even a failed marriage. About 3 years ago when it was all said and done I made a decision to stop giving my body and my mind to men who don't deserve it. I've been celibate since. I can actually say, I don't miss it. I told myself until my 13 year old has moved out of the home and off to college I will not date. Instead I will take that time to reflect on why I choose the wrong men. I will take responsibility for my actions. I am now focused on myself and children. Today I realize I am actually beginning to succeed in that dream. 

Yesterday I spent the day with the best Valentines a gal could ask for.....
*Disclaimer- I never said my Teenager was happy to be My Valentine!

15 comments:

Kmama said...

This is a great post. I'm so glad you had an awesome Valentine's Day and good for you for reaching self contentment. Love you!

Mama Jules said...

Those boys look like awesome Valentines! Congrats on reaching your goal!

LL Cool Joe said...

Good for you! There is nothing worse than being in a relationship that makes you feel unhappy or used. Much better to focus on the wonderful things you do have in your life that bring you joy.

Rachel said...

Isn't that the biggest life lesson? To do what is right for us and our family without feeling the need to compare or compete? So glad you for that growth!

And I cracked up at your note after the picture - because my kiddo never wants to look happy in pictures with me either, LOL!

Miss. C said...

I remember that point, cutting off all the people I didn't have things in commont with AND my first Valentine Day that I wasn't in tears because of some poor choice I made in a man. I love your photo of you guys and I grant you the Valentine's Day Photo Winner of my blog for having a photo with the MOST love!!!

Beth Zimmerman said...

Good for you! I wish my 34 year old daughter, who has children 6 & 8 and keeps jumping from one bad relationship to another, could come to that conclusion! I'm proud of you!

LulĂș said...

That realization you had was a gift. I'm going to remember that phrase, "keeping it pushing!" What an inspirational, thought-provoking post! Nice blog.

riversnake said...

This is THE.BEST Valentine post I have ever read. I love it! And I hope to join you in that place of content one day, too!

~Jill

iamheatherjo said...

Thank you so much for stopping by to visit me. :)

I LOVE that you say you are taking responsibility for your actions. I don't have the best relationship track record and I take the responsibility for making poor decisions where men are concerned. I can't for the life of me figure out why, so I'm not dating, either. I'm not celibate, but I have no interest in dating and haven't for a VERY long time.

I wish you well on your journey and I'm so happy your link led me here. Thank you again. :)

blueviolet said...

I'm just so glad that you're happy and fulfilled with the way things are right now. You're in charge of you now, and that is a fantastic feeling!

I had to laugh when you pointed out your son's face. LOL

Oka said...

You are your best Valentine ;)

Angela said...

I think you are awesome Jane and you are truely one of my heroes! :)

From Tracie said...

This is absolutely the best Valentines post I have read this year.

I love that you are finding success in your dream...and that you have contentment and happiness and safety and a beautiful relationship with your children.

Keep it pushing!

nancygrayce said...

I love the look on your Valentin's face!

Debby@Just Breathe said...

Love the picture. I think your plan is a great one and I admire you for that besides all the other things I admire you for.

 

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